Recent Songs: Liminal Manners

Liminal Manners


You got the callback
You lick the honey drip from the lid
It’s catch and release love
The mud-stained trail on the newlywed

Maybe someday you’ll be happy
Or not
But may you at least know exactly
What you want

Cause I can’t wait forever
Let alone the rest of my life
In the dire hope you’ll remember
What I said about jars and fireflies

Liminal manners
Little squares of tissue on razor cuts
It’s agglutination, that’s bid
A whirl of refuse through a vacant lot

Maybe someday you’ll be happy
Probably not
Still on your way to Cincinnati
Catching dust

But I can’t wait forever
Let alone the rest of my life
As you try to make a lantern
From all the glimmers in your night

Let alone
Let alone the rest of my life
Let alone
Please, let alone the rest of my life!

Maybe someday you’ll be happy
Or not
I’d leave you if I knew exactly
What I want

Still, I can’t wait forever
All I have is the rest of my life
As you try to make a lantern
From all the glimmers in your night

No, I can’t wait forever
Let alone the rest of my life
In the dire hope you’ll remember
What I said about jars and fireflies


July 16, 2016

Recent Songs: Fade to Shine

Fade to Shine


There’s boots piled in the mudroom
And the closet’s stuffed with coats
Jasmine makes it feel like Christmas
Serving us poison and the antidote
We’re all tangled on the couches
Old friends, why can’t tonight be forever?
Ah well, I’ve got work tomorrow
And the antidote is not really the cure

I’ve got to fade out
To shine on
But, maybe I’ll see you Sunday
Hanging around the billiard hall?
I’ve got to fade out
To shine on
But, maybe I’ll catch you Sunday
Hanging around the billiard hall?

Danny starts talking about the devil
Why don’t you ask him about his past?
He’s got this shoe-box full of thoughts and prayers
He could crash a masquerade without a mask
But Trouble’s got him laughing
She can eat a man alive without one complaint
Still, when you get too close to heaven
Freedom starts to feel like the thing you must escape

And my soul can’t bare my heart anymore…

I’ve got to fade out
To shine on
But maybe I’ll see you Sunday
Hanging around the billiard hall?
I’ve got to fade out
To shine on
But maybe I’ll catch you Sunday
Hanging around the billiard hall?

The Five of Cups is getting married
Third time maybe like Casey at the bat
While Trouble and The Mess keep jazzing around
Each time, wearing different hats
Right now I’ll live for moments
But nothing cheap and nothing fake
Still friends with all my Ex’s
And I can still say that with a perfectly straight face

But my soul can’t bare my heart anymore…

I’ve got to fade out
To shine on
But maybe I’ll see you Sunday
Hanging around the billiard hall?
I’ve got to fade out
To shine on
But maybe I’ll catch you Sunday
Hanging around the billiard hall?


July 2, 2016

Recent Songs: Affection For You

Affection For You


Do you…
Have the time
To give to me?
To give to you?
What’s on my mind?
Oh, this oxytocin
Whenever I’m close
In so close to you

What do I want?
Girl, I’ve got nothing but affection for you
What do I want?
Girl, I’ve got nothing but affection for you
I’ve got nothing but affection for you
I’ve got nothing but affection
For you

All day
I’ve gotten by
Just thinking of you
Of stolen summer nights
Picking violets
And daffodils
Watching the brown bats
From a stump on the hill

What do I want?
Girl, I’ve got nothing but affection for you
What do I want?
Girl, I’ve got nothing but affection for you
I’ve got nothing but affection

I’ve… been trying to get away
And you know you don’t owe me a thing
But lately, don’t you feel the same
As you’ve been juggling chainsaws?

So do you…
Have the time
To give to me?
To give to you?
What’s on my mind?
Oh, this oxytocin
Whenever I’m close
In so close to you

What do I want?
Girl, I’ve got nothing but affection for you
What do I want?
Girl, I’ve got nothing but affection for you
I’ve got nothing but affection for you

What do I want?
Girl, I’ve got nothing but affection for you
What do I want?
Girl, I’ve got nothing but affection for you
I’ve got nothing but affection for you




March 13, 2016

Recent Songs: Shadow Boxer

Shadow Boxer


Elli was a shadow boxer
Back when I used to call her mine
The ring was always empty
But it weren’t for lack of trying
The wall that was in front of her
Was everything she swore she’d put behind
Like a dog chasing its tail, sweet Elli
You turned your hunger, set to eat yourself alive

Shadow boxer, still learning how to fight
With your mind off the corner and your heart under light
Shadow boxer, still not sure what you fight
Dancing like a single candle in the town square at night
Holding this vigil
For joy and for spite

I once saw you fight the ocean
For twelve hard rounds it never fell
Chaffed and weary you collapsed upon the beach
For so much distance you’d covered little ground
The wall that is in front of you
It’s the horizon you’re too afraid to reach
You turn to me and say, well what about you?
I say, for those who can’t, babe, they teach

Shadow boxer, still learning how to fight
With your mind off the corner and your heart under light
Shadow boxer, still not sure what you fight
Dancing like a single candle in the town square at night
Shadow boxer, still learning how to fight
With your mind off the corner and your heart under light
Shadow boxer, still not sure what you fight
Dancing like a single candle in the town square at night
Holding this vigil
For joy and for spite


May 22, 2016

Recent Song: Moon Over Water Street (Soggy Roots)

Moon Over Water Street (Soggy Roots)


Goose-Man stood the band up
But they swear he’s worth the chase
The pixie girls all found Jesus
This time they won’t let him escape
Another fellowship comes apart, I guess
Before cause outlives effect
I’ve got half a mind to tell the whole lot off
But I don’t trust my impulses

I don’t know what I’m doing
But you – ease my mind
So if you’re not too tired
I will steal the time
It’s not yet midnight
Though there’s a full moon over Water Street
Pulling the tides of nostalgia up over me

Cyrano says to woo you
Astrophel insists take flight
The firemen ready the trampoline
When you ask me for a light
I’ve been thinking about a blind friend of mine
That never answers when I call
Because she knows I’ve been a tightrope walker
Ever since I learned to fall

And I don’t know what I’m doing
But you – ease my mind
So if you’re not too frightened
I’ll keep walking the line
It’s not yet midnight
Though there’s a full moon over Water Street
Pulling the tides of nostalgia up over me

Last call at the end of the street
Less of a crawl than an exodus
The Hurdy Gurdy Man laid every one off
But keeps things floating like an octopus
And hey, whatever happened to Goose-Man?
Got into alchemy with dreams of swans
The band’s still waiting for his golden eggs
Those were the first things that he pawned

Well I could them tell how I felt sorry
I could say that I support the cause
I could piss in the alley against a drainpipe
And make it sound like an applause
Lately I’ve been so pessimistic
I’ve stopped polishing my boots
Let my hair grow gray while wasting away
Like a plant with soggy roots

And I don’t know what I’m doing
But you – ease my mind
I probably shouldn’t call you
But you’ve always been so kind
It’s not yet midnight
Though there’s a full moon over Water Street
Pulling the tides of nostalgia up over me


May 22, 2016

Recent Songs: Better I Don't Know

Better I Don’t Know



With or without fortune
With or without following
With or without breadcrumbs
With or without siblings

We don’t know what’s over
We just climb to climb it
We don’t know what’s waiting
But we’ll put it all behind us

Just take… from… my mind…

(x2)
Home
Better I don’t know
Love
Better I don’t know
Time
Better I don’t know
Dyin’
Better I don’t know

And if this road
Takes us where
You fear
It is going…
And I see
Her walk on by
In that goddamn
Summer dress…

With or without guidance
With or without extra strings
With or without matches
With or without a good church key
She don’t suffer rain-soaked fools
Hold her friends like cigarettes
Snake oil’s snake oil be it served
In Dixie cups or cut glass

Just take… from… my mind…

Dawn
With the cold water
Days
Over gravel roads
Dusk
In the same old town
Night
Moon rakers

(x2)
Home
Better I don’t know
Love
Better I don’t know
Time
Better I don’t know
Dyin’
Better I don’t know

Better I don’t know
Better I don’t know
Better I don’t know
Better I don’t know


January 22, 2016

Recent Songs: Three or Four Times

Three or Four Times


Heard you been seeing a parsley boy
Kind you leave at the edge of your plate
While I big talked about a pot of gold
The trick to catch it ’s not to chase
Yeah, so I got old – died three or four times
They never said how long to wait

I took a back road south
Tripped on a cottonmouth
Had me a sit
And half a mind to stay

You try to save the world with pamphlets
He tries to live out of his hat
You say these things about love and no limits
But I don’t trust your math
Girl – you ran away from D.C. three or four times
So, why the hell ya moving back?

I’ll call your kettle black
Got me a crayon map
If I could serve lips
I’d kiss time on its face

You’re buttoning up some changing
Took a hammer to a wrought-iron frown
Swore you weren’t going back to Oak Heart
‘Til you could see the higher ground
Man, all this talk about straightening out
Me, I’d rather ride the river down

I took a back road south
Tripped on a cottonmouth
Had me a sit
And half a mind to stay

Momma knew bootleggers
Said – can’t be a cowboy without a cow
Then took her books to the top of the wall
And threw Easter eggs at the crowd
She said – you want to know the true story of my life?
Try askin’ someone it weren’t about

I called your kettle black
Me and my crayon map
Still, if I could serve lips
I’d kiss time on its smug face

I took a back road south
Tripped on a cottonmouth
Had me a sit
And half a mind to stay


April 14, 2016

Recent Songs: Giving Smoke (and Stealing Mirrors)

Giving Smoke (and Stealing Mirrors)


Who stole the fire
Just to give it away?
Shenandoah is burning
Fly a little higher
What dreams like these will make of us
California, don’t belong here

It’s not a new story
No matter how sweetly you tell it
This town’s like a stage premiering Hamlet
The grease on his hands
Stains six little red painkillers
As you tell your father the stars are calling you

But who stole the fire
Just to give it away?
Shenandoah is burning
Fly a little higher
What dreams like these will make of us
California, don’t belong here

Look into the water
Until there is nothing to look back
And tell me again of your beauty
Motor oil like a rainbow
In a pothole filled with dirty rain
Tell me again of your beauty

It’s not a new story
No matter how sweetly you tell it
The chain-smoking of bummed cigarettes
So free as a bird, babe
Everything’s free and no one is paid
If it’s reassuring then you’ll chain-smoke it

And who stole the fire
Just to give it away?
Shenandoah is burning
Fly a little higher
What dreams like these will make of us
California, don’t belong here


April 26, 2016

Recent Songs: Ember

Ember


I was a red-hot ember
That you held in your bare palm
I tried… to become so cold for you
To keep you from harm
I tried… to become so cold for you
When all I wanted was to keep you warm

Feel like an old steel umbrella
A portable lightening rod
I tried… to shield you from the storm
To keep you from harm
I tried… to shield you from the storm
But my ways were old and wrong

If the world turned you to diamond
I bet you’d dream of being coal
I tried… to shine so bright for you
To show you weren’t alone
I tried… to shine so bright for you
By burning up all of my heart’s coal

Until I was a red-hot ember
That you held in your bare palm
Then I tried… to become so cold for you
To keep you from harm
I tried… to become so cold for you
All I wanted was to keep you warm
All I wanted was to keep you warm


April 9, 2016

Recent Songs: Ribbons

Ribbons

Under the bridge
I’m fishing for river eels
Drinking away the feels
Lost, trying to get lost
Been so long
But a year comes around
Time to take off the mask
Like Ferlinghetti unwound

Your blood is in my blood
And it’s tearing me to ribbons
Baby Duck
Your blood is in my blood
And it’s tearing me to ribbons
It is tearing me up...
It’s tearing me up…

Sebastian
You don’t look so saintly
Took your dreams by the root
A tycoon of your body
For awhile
I took shade ‘neath your tree
‘Till in the hollow I found
Your shaved and chained chimpanzee

Now sister
I can’t go back to that place
You make so many excuses
Your need needs you to not face it
Been so long
But a year comes around
And in the shadows of streetlights
I hear his hymns from your mouth

Your blood is in my blood
And it’s tearing me to ribbons
Baby Duck
Your blood is in my blood
And it’s tearing me to ribbons
It is tearing me up…
It’s tearing me up…


March 13, 2016

Recent Songs: High Functioning

High Functioning


You say you’re the life of the party
As you make me your matador
Cause all these China girls aren’t smiling
Those are just cracks in their lacquer
Hasn’t it all become so tiring?
Haven’t we grown a little old
To still be chasing after things
That will dissolve hitting our pillows

High… functioning
You say you’re high… functioning
Functioning
But I’ve seen you in low places
And you ain’t no Goblin King

What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger
You might as well drink from lead pipes
The tiniest stain outside on the sidewalk
Where she waited for her getaway ride
What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger, you say?
Man, haven’t you grown a little old?
To be talking so much sulfur
And still not speaking any gold

High… functioning
You say you’re high… functioning
Functioning
But I’ve seen you in low places
And you ain’t no Goblin King


March 13, 2016

Recent Songs: Minotaur

Minotaur


You pause
You swear you’ve been this way before
So, so lost
You’ve fallen for a minotaur

And you know it’s not right
To feel like you do
And you know it’s not right
What he puts you through
Feels like something removed is at stake
He leaves you in a daze
He puts you in a maze

You fight
The hand you once kissed is the hand you must bite
Those burning eyes
Waiting at the alter for his blood soaked bride

And you know it’s not right
To feel like you do
And you know it’s not right
What he puts you through
Feels like something removed is at stake
He leaves you in a daze
He puts you in a maze

You pause
You swear you’ve been this way before
So, so lost
You’ve fallen for a minotaur

And you know it’s not right
To feel like you do
And you know it’s not right
What he puts you through
Feels like something removed is at stake
He leaves you in a daze
He puts you in a maze


August, 2015

Recent Songs: Carolina's Calling Me Too

Carolina’s Calling Me Too


The worst of times, from far enough
We come to call the best
I know you don’t want to say no
But you know you can’t say yes
Carolina’s calling
Can’t seem to let it rest

Wantin’ ain’t the same as asking
I told myself that made it all okay
But you knowing how I feel
It’s like hearing me ask it every day
Carolina’s calling
The sun is bleeding in the bay

Sometimes you get so quiet
Staring past the walls of your living room
Then you start to say something
Only to smile tryin’ to hide your mood
Carolina’s calling
You know it’s calling for me too?

Yeah, Carolina’s calling…
But if you called, I’d answer you

I want that warm feeling back
I want that warm, damned feeling back
It’s a sickness
A siren’s whispered kiss
Now all I hear is Carolina calling me

I see vultures perched in every tree
That you try to rest beneath
I hope I’m not the same as them
But that don’t make me what you need
Carolina’s calling
And neither you nor I can sleep

A friend told me of another girl
She could help make stick the lie
I saw my face reflecting in her eyes
Man, that mug told me it weren’t wise
Carolina’s calling
And god knows that I’ve tried

I thought maybe with a better job
I could plaster all these holes
Tried to put on a new coat of paint
Ended up painting over my windows
And Carolina’s calling
In the dark, I hear echoes

Of Carolina calling…
Can’t get your smell out of my clothes

I want that warm feeling back
I want that warm, damp feeling back
It’s a sickness
A siren’s whispered kiss
Don’t want your smell out of my clothes
No, I want that warm feeling back
I want that warm, damned feeling back
It’s a sickness
A siren’s salty whispered kiss
Now all I hear is Carolina calling me…

The worst of times, from far enough
We come to call the best
I know you don’t want to say no
I’m almost scared you might say yes
Carolina’s calling
And the worst have done their best

Carolina’s calling…
What more is there to confess?



December, 2015 (Revised February 28, 2016)

Recent Songs: Carolina’s Calling

Carolina’s Calling (But You’ll Settle For None)


Has summer begun its terminal shuffle?
Leaves are starting to burn up on the Blue Ridge
We didn’t find time – we just picked up side-jobs
And made them excuses ‘til we were excused

Carolina’s calling
But you settle for none
Carolina’s calling
But you settle for none
Carolina’s calling
But you settle for none
Until there are none
To settle for
Until there are none
For you to settle for

No more back to school – the diplomas been framed
It would be nice to linger, but there’s nothing to claim
Now lord knows I’ll always be a Virginia boy
But I don’t see the dogwoods like hawthorns ‘round you

And Carolina’s calling
But you settle for none
Carolina’s calling
But you settle for none
Carolina’s calling
But you settle for none
Until there are none
To settle for
Until there are none
For you to settle for

Carolina’s calling
But you settle for none
Carolina’s calling
But you settle for none
Carolina’s calling
But you settle for none
Until there are none
To settle for
Until there are none
For you to settle for


December 6, 2015

Recent Songs: The Fever Song

The Fever Song


Tell me, is true art beauty
Or is true art lies?
I find each easiest to conjure when entwined
I only spoke of beauty
I even called it kind:
All this barbed wire that’s tangled around my mind
When you played the servant
You called it love
I played the doctor playing doctor in his vault
And they called me good
And they called me wise
Because the few patients that left matured like wine
Still, what would I know
Of four-letter words
If they aren’t woven to be flails against your worth?
I have kissed your fur
And I bit your neck
But you swear I haven’t tasted your soul yet
When you speak of love
It’s more than mystique
More than an apple growing on a fruitless tree

Oh, is true art beauty
Or is true art lies?
Like prince and pauper, in each other they will hide
The drunken comedian
Let’s call him divine
Because he’s dying to make us smile all the time
The ambassador
Of the promise land
With his folded bills placed on a child’s nightstand
The charismatic tramp
That we all love to hate
Is never scorned in person for leaving all his waifs
The young single-mother
We try to call noble
Her child screaming in his prison unanswered
And I don’t have an answer
I barely have leanings
And you know poets hate to tell you what it means
I hang these ornaments
On a fruitless tree
Trying to make it through another night without calling

Tell me, is true art beauty
Or is true art lies?
I find each easiest to conjure when entwined
You only spoke of beauty
You even called it kind:
All the barbed wire that has tangled up your mind
And we have failed completely
At the top of the hill
In front of everyone that matters to us still
I couldn’t play the prophet
Or be their sacrifice
But I would fall though for you to melt their lake of ice
Still, I couldn’t feel smaller
All that I thought I’d be
Back in the orchard when we were young and naïve
So I release my arms
And hang my humbled head
But the fever takes pen and paper to my bed
I try to keep my distance
Like I could set you free
The wire only tears in deeper as it is released

So is true art beauty
Or is true art lies?
Like love, whatever’s easy I suspect’s contrived
But I don’t have an answer
It’s not that kind of tree
That I lie with you beneath in fever dreams


November 1, 2015

Recent Songs: Blood Sport

Blood Sport


This isn’t who you wanted to be
It’s just an idea you were told that you should
You powder your wig ‘till you feel like a doughnut
Complete with a hole where your center should be

Nothing to prove
We know that you would if you could
But you just can’t
So, there’s nothing to prove
We know that you tried but your living a lie
And dying

So sell yourself short
There’s disease in their blood
And this game is a blood sport
Sell yourself short
There’s disease in their blood
And this game… it’s a blood sport

I just wanted to go
Have a picnic in Barboursville
Down by The Ruins with you
But the storm clouds said, “No”
So I put on my tie and smiled through the grind on nothing
Weekend to weekend
I’m weakening
With nothing to prove
And I’m scared that one day you’ll ask
How to keep going on
When all that I can say to you
Is to…

Sell yourself short
There’s disease in their blood
And this game is a blood sport
Sell yourself short
There’s disease in their blood
And this game, it’s a blood sport
And these
Pomegranate
Seeds in your belly
Are turning you into something you despised
These
Pomegranate
Seeds in your belly
Hold you sick, curled in a panic
Like you’re full of shrapnel butterflies

When there is nothing to prove
We know that you would if you could
But you just can’t
So, there’s nothing to prove
We know that you tried but your living a lie
And dying

So sell yourself short
Sell yourself out
Or maybe just quit selling yourself at all
They’re out for your blood
There’s disease in their blood
And this game…
This game…
This game…
Is a blood sport


October 10, 2015

Recent Songs: Strange Optimism

Strange Optimism


I have found
A strange optimism
On the eve of destruction
I am pulled against my self
Over half the things I’ve said
I want to throw to the flames
Watch this old persona burn
With a smile on my face
When you tell me…

That you’re only gonna break my heart
As if I didn’t know that
As if I didn’t know
But honey, don’t ya know…
That for the thousand ways you might find
I’d still find – a way to break it on my own

Cause I’m a do-it-yourself guy
A do-it-yourself guy
Oh…
Oh… I’m
A do-it-yourself guy
A do-it-yourself guy
So don’t try…
So honey, let it go

I have found
A strange opposition
It draws me closer every day
Just to drag me along the edge
'Til over half the things I’ve done
I want them lost in the flames
But if it costs your bridge to burn
I’d try and come back - somehow, someway

You say you’re only gonna break my heart
As if I didn’t know that
As if I didn’t know
But honey, don’t ya know…
And for the thousand ways you might find
I’d still find – a way to break it on my own

Cause I’m a do-it-yourself guy
A do-it-yourself guy
Oh…
Oh… I'm
A do-it-yourself guy
A do-it-yourself guy
But sometimes, why…
Must I break everything alone?


October 27, 2015

Recent Songs: Please Let Me Please You

Please Let Me Please You


How can I be
What you want me to be
When all I want to be is what you need?
And you don’t need me
And you don’t need me

Please let me please you
Seems like everybody needs you
But when was the last time
That they gave back more than praise?
From all that bereaves you
Oh, please let me please you
It’s an audacious play
But I am trying to say thanks

Too tired to sleep
All your dishes in the sink
You’ve given too much of yourself away
Like horses are your friends
With a rope tied to each limb
To draw and quarter – upon your free time they descend

Please let me please you
Seems like everybody needs you
But when was the last time
That they gave back more than praise?
From all that bereaves you
Oh, please let me please you
It’s an audacious play
But I am trying to say thanks

Where we began
I can’t look back with steady hands
Cold are the nights of recalled yesterdays
So effortlessly
You pulled me out of spiraling
If only then to fall a separate way
Begging you to stay
Begging you to stay

Please let me please you
Seems like everybody needs you
But when was the last time
They called you not wanting something?
Don’t want to deceive you
It’s not for pity or to tease you
In my own selfish way
I am trying to say more than thanks
So Baby, please let me please you
Seems like everybody needs you
But when was the last time
That they gave back more than praise?
From all that bereaves you
Oh, please let me please you
It’s an audacious play
But girl you’ve got me tied to your flank
So please let me please you
You say that you don’t need me to
But please let me please you anyway
Oh, please let me please you
I don’t want to leave you
Please let me please you
All night
And all day


November 7, 2015

Recent Songs: Dopamine

Dopamine


One day we’re burning down the wax museum
Breaking all the mirrors in the funhouse maze
She’s taking off the watches and the bracelets
All of the bands over the band-aids
I’m taking off… to make the day

Dopamine
Dopamine
Dopamine
Dopamine

Ten copycats on a black canoe
None of them knew
None of them knew
A boat can rock even upon still waters

It’s normal to cry
It’s normal to cry
But waking up in the middle of the night
With nothing to dispute
With nothing to feel
Oh, dopamine

I’m exiting the mausoleum
My nightly color wrapped in the rain
They’re not the trappings of a caged lost animal anymore
But then her gray umbrella’s blown away
The gales they’re only getting stronger
The lines are only getting longer
Expected to deal, expected to saunter
Yet punctual, warm and restrained
Oh, dopamine

It’s normal to cry
It’s normal to cry
But waking up in the middle of the night
With nothing to dispute
With nothing to feel
Oh, dopamine

Dopamine
Dopamine
Dopamine
Dopamine

Ten copycats on a black canoe
None of them knew
None of them knew
A boat can rock even upon still waters


September 27th, 2015

Recent Songs: Old Hand

Old Hand


My soul is a basement echo
My soul is a broken chord
My soul is a tin can refrain
Holding up the dead air like a pillar of smoke

I know time’s catching up with me
I know I ain’t got no time
Fire with fire is a yarn with one ending
Selling sand in the desert was the arrow love primed

My heart beat game and baited
Now it’s fanged, so woe betide
My heart is a bedpan heroine
Squandering her beauty in a nunnery of guise

I know time’s catching up with me
I know what can never be mine
Regale my sins into the bottom of a bottle
The regalia of a pariah forever affined  

My mind is a tree of spiders
My mind’s an old witch hunter
A baboon in a maze of mirrors
Old hand, you’ve seen my mind is a horrid lover

But my soul is a basement echo
My soul is a broken chord
Strumming on to a tin can refrain
Calling up to heaven for a crescendo revoked

I know time’s catching up with me
I know I ain’t got no time
Fire with fire is a yarn with one ending
Selling sand in the desert was the arrow love primed

I know time’s catching up with me
I know I ain’t got no time
Fire with fire is a yarn with one ending
Selling sand in the desert was the carol fate twined


April 28, 2015

Recent Songs: The Long Defeat

The Long Defeat


Empire requiems and dirty sheets
I’ve been riding on the long defeat
Boot trampled rose in the blood soaked streets
All that I’ve lost and all that I seek
The worm in the bottle and the devil in the meat
Starved myself, faithful and effete
On the road less traveled, towards my masterpiece
I’ve been riding on the long defeat

Crumbs of love, a villain’s gluttony
A hateful longing, a nurse’s envy
Broke my heart so I could share a piece
And I’ve been riding on the long defeat
From the bread and water of a prisoner’s feast
To the loneliness brought by mended wings
Behind the frail bars of lustful dreams
I’ve been riding on the long defeat

Cracked bells falling like the fruit of old trees
I’ve been riding on the long defeat
Broken ring like the wail of unborn babies
Silence is the ghost of tomorrows yet to leave
Tied to the ship’s wheel between storm and reef
All that I’ve lost and all that I seek
The girl I’ll never have and the girl I cannot keep
I’ve been riding on the long defeat

Empire requiems and dirty sheets
I’ve been riding on the long defeat
On a pale horse fittingly named, “Prophecy”
Off the road less traveled, far from my masterpiece
Now I’m sweeping up the sidewalks after the parade leaves
In the loneliness brought by mended wings
And though I hang my spurs over this mantel of grief
Know that I’m still riding on the long defeat


September 20th, 2015

Recent Songs: The Beast in Me

The Beast in Me


You say you can’t imagine me ever losing my cool
Well, you’re fool, girl
You say there’s no way I could ever even hurt a fly
Oh, it makes me want to cry…
To think how little you know what you’re getting into

Girl
You don’t see the beast in me
You tell me
You don’t see the beast in me
Well honey
Maybe I hide the beast in me
Till someday
He comes to see you very indiscreetly
RUN!
RUN!
Run while my guard is down
RUN!
RUN!
Run while he’s chained down, sleeping in the cellar
Run…

You’re hanging skylines over the holes I’ve punched in the walls
Keeping things rosy
I want to save you but you always answer when I call
Oh, it makes me want to cry…
Because I see so clearly what you’re getting into

Girl
You don’t see the beast in me
You tell me
You don’t see the beast in me
Well honey
Maybe I hide the beast in me
Till someday
He comes to see you very indiscreetly
Girl
You don’t see the beast in me
You tell me
You don’t see the beast in me
Well honey
Maybe I hide the beast in me
Till someday
He comes to see you very indiscreetly
RUN!
RUN!
Run while my guard is down
RUN!
RUN!
Run while he’s chained down, sleeping in the cellar
RUN!
RUN!
Run while he’s chained down, sleeping in the cellar
RUN!
RUN!
Run while my guard is down, down, down, down
Run…

Run while he’s chained down, sleeping in the cellar
Run…


August 12, 2015

Recent Songs: This Town Could Do Better

This Town Could Do Better


If I had a twin brother
I would try to hook him up with you
He wouldn’t be perfect
But could do better
Than the piece of shit – we call, “You Know Who”

This fucking town
Is going to break your heart
That’s what it does
But I thought you knew
Back when you said
You’d seen gold turned to lead
And still believed in the golden rule

If I could build a golem
I’d build a golem just for you
Into his clay
I’d mix my best parts
And fill the rest with proverbs and glue

This fucking town
Is going to break your heart
That’s what it does
But I thought you knew
Back when you said
You’d seen gold turned to lead
And still believed in the golden rule

I wish you were more of a bitch
I wish you you’d stand a little more straight
But hey, look at me
I wouldn’t call me Caliban
But I am far, far from a saint

This fucking town
Is going to break our hearts
That’s what it does
I always knew
Back when you said
You’d seen gold turned to lead
I still believed in the golden rule

Yeah, I still believe in the golden rule


July, 2015

Recent Songs: So Wrong

So Wrong

I wish I could hate you
I know that would make it easier
I wish I could shake the shit outta you
I wish I could live… on a separate Earth
I wish I could love you
The way you needed to be loved
After all that we’ve been through
I wish that enough would just be enough

How… did we get it so wrong?
How… did we get it so wrong?

I wish I could remember
All the days in your photographs
I wish to god I could forget
The last time… that I made you laugh
I wish I could make art out of this
Instead of blood on the floor
As much as I have lifted myself up
I always wake up cryin’… ‘gainst another door

How… did we get it so wrong?
How… did we get it so wrong?
How… did we get it so wrong?
How… did we get it so wrong?

I wish I could hate you
Instead of lingering like fool
I wish I could burn down everything
All the evidence… that we were always doomed
I wish I could love you
And just leave you all we shaped
After all that we’ve been through
We still can’t stop… what the tide will take

How… did we get it so wrong?
How… did we get it so wrong?


July 27th, 2015

Recent Songs: Painful Love

Painful Love


Give me painful love
Give me painful, painful love
Give me painful love
Give me painful, painful love
‘Cause when the hurting really starts
I want to have a seasoned heart
So give me painful love
Give me painful, painful love

Give me hard love
Give me cold hard bedrock love
Give me hard love
Give me cold hard bedrock love
‘Cause when the wind blows cold and strong
An easy love won’t hold for long
Give me hard love
Give me cold hard bedrock love

Give me distant love
Give me far off distant love
Give me distant love
Give me that far off distant love
Never been known for my patience
But I’m a sucker for punishment
So give me distant love
Give me far off distant love

‘Cause I… am… a sensitive man
Despite a high threshold for pain
Yeah, I… am… a sensitive man
With a hunger that this night life can’t sustain

Cause I want true love
I want true blue honest love
Come give me true love
Give me that true blue honest love
And make it hurt like a baby’s birth
For every ounce I’ll bleed its worth
Lord, give me true love
Give painful, painful love

Give me painful love
Give me painful, painful love
Give me painful love
Give me painful, painful love
‘Cause when the hurting really starts
I want to have a seasoned heart
So give me painful love
Give me painful, painful love


September 27th 2015

Recent Songs: A Seven-Year War

A Seven-Year War


Woke up in a mega-mart parking lot
I’d let the radio drain the battery
The stars like seeds planted up in the sky
Grew out into a cold pale morning
Dollar-ten coffee in a Styrofoam cup
I swear, I shouldn’t let you throw me this way
Wait on my hood for my sister to come
And when she does she says, “Well, Happy Birthday!”

But let me tell ya now...

You and me, we’re a Seven-Year War
I know I’ll never win
You’re love is a thousand cuts
And I’m too thin-skinned

First time I saw you, you were all lace and boots
You were talking about Richmond and clubs
We drank too much and kissed against a brick wall
It was romantic ‘til it caught up with us
Last time I saw you, you threw a glass at me
You said, “I hate the way you smile at me sometimes.”
I bet my skin’s still under your fingernails
You’re sentimental when no one's in your vice

You and me, we’re a Seven-Year War
I know I’ll never win
You’re love is a thousand cuts
And I’m too thin-skinned

Maybe you’ll end up in New Orleans
Doing like you said you would
Maybe I’ll end up in Austin
I’ll probably still do no good
Yesterday, I met this real cool girl
And she’s already stolen my mind
You say my problem’s that I can’t be alone
But Babe, I feel alone all the time

And don't forget, hon

You and me, we’re a Seven-Year War
I know I’ll never win
You’re love is a thousand cuts
And I’m too thin-skinned
You and me, we’re a Seven-Year-War
Soon as it’s over it starts over again
Three-dog-nights make me take your blankets
Cause I am so, so thin-skinned

So, so...
So thin-skinned
So, so...
So thin-skinned


August 16, 2015

Recent Songs: There’s Nothing Behind Your Smile

There’s Nothing Behind Your Smile

“I wish it rained down cobalt blue,”
You say, under the big pink lights
From the balcony over the pool
Where young bloods party like its judgment night
“Cause if the rain were cobalt blue,” you say
“I think the world would look the way that I feel”
You like to talk romantic shit like that
You think you’re Gatsby, but your not at the wheel

And there is nothing behind your smile
There is nothing behind your smile
She cries… she cries…
She cries… out

You build your castles in a full-length mirror
You’re like an opera on the Amazon
You say, “I swear I’m going to make it all better”
But you still need the blood to run
And it goes on and on and on and on
And on and on and on…
It’s got to run like a river, run like a river, run like a river
And it goes on and on and on!
And there is nothing behind your smile
There is nothing behind your smile
She cries… she cries…
She cries… out...

And there is nothing behind your smile
There is nothing behind your smile
She cries… she cries…
She cries… out

Out into your eyes
Out into your bottomless eyes!
She cries out into your eyes
She cries… she cries…
She cries…


July 20th, 2015

Recent Songs: Amber (Home is Unavailable)

Amber (Home is Unavailable)


Home is where you peel
Like a tangerine
For the stolen Sundays
Their essential oils

But there are cracks in the ceiling
A condensation of condescending builds
And there are cracks in the ceiling
Draw truth and light from a radiator still

Such a trial for a truffle
A trifle of the dew
Just a drop of you
And this hour’s in amber
Such a trial for a truffle
A trifle of the dew
Just a drop of you
And this hour’s held in amber…
And this hour’s held in amber…

But home...
Is currently unavailable                       
But home...
Is currently unavailable         

Home is where you peel
Gather the falling curls
Such tender tinder
Kindling for the crucible

But there are cracks in the ceiling
And pictures pinned to the make-up mirror
God, there are cracks in the ceiling
You smelt the slag but lose the weight of your heart

Such a trial for a truffle
A trifle of the dew
Just a drop of you
And this hour’s in amber
Such a trial for a truffle
A trifle of the dew
Just a drop of you
And this hour’s held in amber…
And this hour’s held in amber…
Yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah

But home...
Is currently unavailable                       
But home...
Is currently unavailable     


Such a trial for a truffle
A trifle of the dew
Just a drop of you
And this hour’s in amber
Such a trial for a truffle
A trifle of the dew
Just a drop of you
And this hour’s held in amber…
And this hour’s held in amber…


But home...
Is currently unavailable                       
But home...
Is currently unavailable     


July 25, 2015

Recent Songs: Someone Else's Skin

Someone Else’s Skin


Molly is a cannibal
I call myself an exhibitionist
We’ve done things we’re still learning how to regret
“Love is a cancer,” I said
Disguised as an answer, I read
My hairs falling out and still she hasn’t put my ring on yet

No, she keeps dressing me down
Dressing me down again
One of these days, she ought to dress me up in someone else’s skin

Princess of the slaughterhouse
Down the catwalk hand in hand with Faust
What she does with her time didn’t used to matter much to me
“Love is a cancer,” she says
Life is a dance at Death’s Masque
With all these débutantes, so kind, so cruel with each curtsy

And now she dressing me down
Dressing me down again
One of these days, she ought to dress me up in someone else’s skin

She’s dressing me down, dressing me down again
She’s dressing me down, dressing me down again
Girl, you keep dressing me down, dressing me down again
Well one of these days, maybe I’ll dress me up in someone else’s skin

Molly is a cannibal
I call myself an exhibitionist
We’ve done things we’re still learning how to regret

 
August 2, 2015 (revised July 16, 2016)

Recent Songs: I Prefer My Nightmares to My Dreams

I Prefer My Nightmares to My Dreams


Waiting for the other shoe
Is nothing new
To me
But I’ve never had to wait this long
For anything
To go wrong

What am I going to do with my heart?
It’s in no shape for anything real

I prefer my nightmares to my dreams
When I wake their talons release me
But in my dreams Eden’s are made
That I would die not to escape
I fall every time I open up my eyes

Everything you say is cruel
In a soft
Familiar way
Full of velvet and mirror shards
And to the music - god, how you sway

What am I going to do with my heart?
It’s too raw to taste your salt

And I prefer my nightmares to my dreams
But in the night you always visit me
And seldom have I been so scared
Of needles and thread meant to repair
Then, just before the dawn, you smile and leave

Waiting for the other shoe
Is nothing new
To me
But I’ve never had to wait this long
For anything
To go wrong

What am I going to do with my heart?
It’s in no shape to drum this beat

I prefer my nightmares to my dreams
I prefer my nightmares to my dreams…


July 12, 2015

Recent Songs: Blood Can't Always Win

Blood Can't Always Win

You can’t keep on
Keeping on
The things you’re doing are doing you in
You’re pushing tungsten
Against the rough
But you’re not diamond
No, you’re made of softer stuff
And time…
You have heard it all before
Time and time again
Time will always win

But man, I’m more alive dying than I’ve ever felt in my life
You said, I’m more alive dying than I’ve ever felt in my life
Woe!
Sad song
Blah, blah, blah!
Sad songs
Blah, blah, blah!
Yeah, blah, blah, blah!

You can say that
You can cut a smile
You can still cut a rug for a little while
But you’re grinding down
Pulling your own petals off
You love yourself - you love yourself not
Killing yourself over a dull love
And time…
Tick-ticking of the IV drip
Eating all the fortune cookies
Without reading the fortunes

But man, I’m more alive dying than I’ve ever felt in my life
You said, I’m more alive dying than I’ve ever felt in my life
Woe!
Sad songs
Blah, blah, blah!
Girl, you're a sad song
Blah, blah, blah!
Yeah, blah, blah, blah!
Blah, blah, blah!
Blah, blah, blah!

You can’t keep on
Keeping on
The things you’re doing are doing you in
You’re pumping bargains
And not facing facts
You’ve long left the crossroads
Slow train going down the tracks
And blood…
Tick-ticking of the IV drip
Time and time again
But blood can’t always win

But man, I’m more alive dying than I’ve ever felt in my life
You said, I’m more alive dying than I’ve ever felt in my life
My life… woe!
Sad song
Blah, blah, blah!
Sad songs
Blah, blah, blah!
Yeah, blah, blah, blah!
Blah, blah, blah!
Blah, blah, blah!


August 8, 2015

Recent Songs: That Much Would Do

That Much Would Do


Closer than to touch
I hear your breath
I wish you would rest your head on my chest
And that much would do

I am weary but wary
The flesh is so weak
I wish I could rest my head on your breast
And that much would do

And I’m trying to keep promises that I made to myself
While drinking wine in a water glass
Somehow inertia’s giving me jet-lag
Feel like my soul is a time zone away
And anything will do
Just stay

Disorientation
I try to connect
Social yet secluded, disembodied and set
An empty couch in a humming room

Hyperbole
Orbiting the sink
I float the night on the thoughts that you link
So drained, I'm slipping through

Slipping through...

And I’m trying to keep promises that I made to myself
While drinking wine in a water glass
The needle’s bobbing at the end of the record
Feel like my soul is a time zone away
And anything will do
Just stay

Closer than to touch
I feel your breath
I wish you would rest your head on my chest
And that much would do

I am weary but wary
The flesh is so weak
I wish I could rest my head on your breast
Cause that much would do

Paisley’s and snuffed smoke
An old birthday wish
Mr. Glamour and Sadness
Go watch Lillian Gish
And teach yourself to smile...

And I’m trying to keep promises that I made to myself
While drinking wine in a water glass
A sleepy smile as you merge with the futon
Feel like my soul is a time zone away
And anything will do
And anything will do
And anything will do
And anything will do…
And anything will do

Paisley’s and snuffed smoke
An old birthday wish
Mr. Glamour and Sadness
Go watch Lillian Gish
And teach yourself to smile!


July 20th, 2015

Recent Songs: Year of the Ox

Year of the Ox


Blue Eyes, call me up sometime
You always could make me smile
I don’t ask for Cana wine
I little light will do
Maybe I’m in need of a muse
Or maybe just a friend I can talk to
Blue Eyes, call me up sometime
I want it to be you

You tell me you’re just a dream
That I painted on a simple girl
A canvas that cannot be framed
You were always set to sail
I never meant any abuse
I never meant to rest my world on you
Blue Eyes, call me up sometime
I want in-turn for you

Won’t you tell me how you’ve been?
I’m not in love with the sound of my voice
Potemkin villages I’ve built
But on a telephone, silence is never choice
Maybe I need to go back home
I never traveled far but I’ve been so gone
Blue Eyes, call me up sometime
I’m taking the prodigal road

Wisteria blooms on the gate
I’m missing a button on my coat
Should I return or should I wait?
Search my pockets for a light when I don’t even smoke
Kneeling at my old name’s tomb
An old coffee can bare hands exhume
Blue Eyes, can I make you smile?
I’m haunted by my dues

Remember the time capsule we made
The pictures from the promenade
The pouch of buttons and the river stone
The scrap of lace and the broken horn
The pressed flowers and lyrics scrawled
The sea glass and old ticket stubs
The manifesto and the manifest
The feathers and the candle wax
And you tell me you’re just a dream
I’m standing at your front porch screen
With the coffee can that we buried
And such a longing to sleep
Maybe I’m just passing through
Maybe I’ll wake up to nothing new
Blue Eyes, it’s been a long time
But I wanted to tell you

Blue Eyes, call me up sometime
You always could make me smile
I don’t ask for Cana wine
I little light will do
Maybe I’m in need of a muse
Or maybe just a friend I can talk to
Blue Eyes, call me up sometime
I want it to be you


July 6, 2015