Shuffle Away

Shuffle Away


Better to ask for forgiveness
Than for permission
Says the rapist to - a standing ovation
Can taste the vomit in my mouth
When you tell me how to take the higher ground

Just shuffle away
Shuffle away
Just shuffle away
Shuffle away

You oughta be drawn and quartered
In the middle of the street
There's nothing more for you to do
Why can't you be done?

Just shuffle away
Shuffle away
Just shuffle away
Shuffle away

January, 2020

Sweat Bee in a Dandelion

Sweat Bee in a Dandelion


Nonchalant
What you want
If it comes
It's after the end
And I'm all dumb luck here with you
Sweet and wrong
Still talkin'
If it comes
It comes after the end

You are and so am I
I oblige
Pervert, be kind
Oh, my mind had gone elsewhere
We are outside

Self-taught
Like a bad habit
Beautiful lick wounds
Romantic
Love and fame, please don't forget
Am I to be inanimate?

Sweat bee in a dandelion
Taste like ice
Pervert, be kind
Oh, my mind had gone elsewhere
We are outside

You are and so am I
I oblige
Pervert, be kind
Oh, my mind had gone elsewhere
We are outside


September 27, 2019

Fortune

Fortune


Elderflowers and sandalwood
The bones in your hands
They feel like piano keys
And your palms remind me of
Stained glass windows
Unfinished (or broken)

Of your fortune, I cannot read
But how fortunate I am to be
Holding your hand, for so long
For so long... So, so sweet
This brief connection

Words like feathers
Floating from my mouth
Some hawks and peacocks
But mostly down
And you whisper ravens and sparrows
To me
To me
To me
To me

Of your fortune, I cannot read
But how fortunate I am to be
Holding your hand, for so long
For so long... So, so sweet
This brief connection
So, so sweet
This brief connection


July 2019

Exhibition

Exhibition


Kiss crushed velvet
Coterie of skin
You say
But I'd rather have...
Their eyes on me
Their eyes on me

All pasley pupils
Black like black netting
Dilated so
The black rainbow, to give
You give to me
You give to me

Making
Porno for dead gods
Porno for dead gods
Porno for dead gods
Dead and dreaming

Kiss crushed velvet
Coterie of skin
You say
But I'd rather have...
Their eyes on me
Their eyes on me

Making
Porno for dead gods
Porno for dead gods
Porno for dead gods
Dead and dreaming


July 2019

Conserve

Conserve


Trapped by trappings
Prescribe me subscriptions
I have such slender means
And bloated dreams to sound

Pressured
Conserve the air to breathe...
Pressured
Conserve the air to breathe...

Steady drip, feed
My anxiety is caving-in
So distract me...
Cartoon violence
Swastikas for Noddy
Esoteric dives
For pearls of shock and awe

Pressured
Conserve the air to breathe...
Pressured
Conserve the air to breathe...

Trapped by trappings
Prescribe me subscriptions
I have such slender means
And bloated dreams to sound


July 2019

Charcoal Heart

Charcoal Heart


It's hard to watch you grow into yourself
And shed my projections
All the rubbings of a charcoal heart
It's hard to face them

Ask anyone who's ever tried to love me
They'll tell you I don't ever dance
Until... I wanted to dance with you

But you look happy
So much happier than I've...
Ever seen you before
You look happy
So much happier than I've...
Ever seen you before
Ever seen you before

All the rubbings of a charcoal heart
All the rubbings of a charcoal heart
All the rubbings of a charcoal heart
It's hard to face them

But you look happy
So much happier than I've...
Ever seen you before
You look happy
So much happier than I've...
Ever seen you before


July 8, 2019

Day For Night

Day For Night


Day for night
Living on borrowed time
No signal blue - dark starless sky

Day for night
Living on borrowed time
No signal blue - dark starless sky

Burning the candle from both ends
Taking the ride
Away from your friends

This is who you are
Haven't a thought - a thought to stop

Day for night
Living on borrowed time
No signal blue - dark starless sky

This is who you are
Sure as a salmon swimming raw against the rocks
Raw against the rocks


March 2019

Broken Things

Broken Things


I gather up my self-respect
It is a heavy stone held high over my head
The road is full of venomous snakes
How they hiss at me like many broken things
Would it not be mercy?
To bring my burden down?
In my place, would they not do the same?

Some people - I don't know how I've not given in
But I maintain that with no rock there is no real compassion

You tell me I'm too dismissive
That I'm too quick to turn my back on ferrel dogs
But it is so damn hard, having been bitten
To hear their barking as an earnest cry for help
But alone, unloved
What more could they be
In the outlands of self-fulfilled prophecy?

I know, I know, I know, I know but...

Some people - I don't know how I've not given in
But I watch you give and give only to be so taken

I gather up my self-respect
It is heavy stone, held high over my head
You say I'll never be until I let things go
If you could see the iceberg that I am below!
You talk of martyrdom
With so much flotsam
How can you ever forgive that which you've forgotten?

Some people - I don't know how I've not given in
But I maintain that with no rock there is no real compassion

So I carry on
I carry on
And I hold that stone up high
Trembling
Trembling
As is my love


November 8, 2018

Driving Past Your House at Night

Driving Past Your House at Night


Driving past your house at night
On my way home
Two silhouettes entwined
Inside your window
I try not to pay any mind
To what I know's not my concern
Owning up to feelings I simply wish weren't

Empty streets
Nobody left but the creatures of the night
She said I could stay over
But I couldn't make my head feel right - about it
I'm over you
Swear I'm really over you
Sometimes I get so low
I'd risk the bends to kiss your shoe
As you do

Driving past your house at night
On my way home
Two silhouettes entwined
Inside your window
I try not to pay any mind
To what I know's not my concern
Owning up to feelings I simply wish weren't

The town's too dark
Everybody wants to have a witch to burn for light
She said I could stay over
I didn't want to know which of us was right - about me
Stop messing around
I'm just messing around
For all that I know
I'm still a mess making messes
Bound to abound

Driving past your house at night
On my way home
Two silhouettes entwined
Inside your window
I try not to pay any mind
To what I know's not my concern
Owning up to feelings I simply wish weren't

Trying to be better than this
Trying to be better than this
But when no one is watching
I'm just trying not to lose my grip
Stare myself down in the rearview mirror


November 11, 2018

Known

Known


I could be a thousand miles from here
I could listen to everything
Untie the stars and draw new constellations
Go load my heart into a sling

You don't have a shackle on me
It's not about what's done and owed
They all want me to paint them vivid pictures
But with you I don't feel so cold

Give to me?
What's the use in giving
What we don't really have
But I have so much to give
That I don't really have
Oh, I have so much to give
So much that you can't hold
So much that I can't hold

You once asked, "If I could be with anyone...?"
So I told an old Marx Brothers joke
The more I'd alter with hypotheticals
The more they become mirrors in smoke

What if she didn't have a lover?
Wishing her sorrow, I'd hardly call that love
Wherever you wake up tomorrow
Honey, if you're happy, that's all I'll say I want

Give to me?
What's the use in giving
What we don't really have
But I have so much to give
That I don't really have
Oh, I have so much to give
So much that you can't hold
So much that I can't hold

I once felt your breath from between your lips
Pulled slowly in through mine
For just a moment
On a pinhead, foolish and divine
Oh well, nevermind
Fingertips caressing scars

I could be a thousand miles from here
Unweighed have past few offerings
Lotus or driftwood, we call much company
Simple props in our private tragedies

But you don't have a shackle on me
It's not about what's done or owed
As much as I could love anyone, I love you
I am grateful to know and feel known

Give to me?
What's the use in giving
What we don't really have
But I have so much to give
That I don't really have
Oh, I have so much to give
So much that you can't hold
So much that I can't hold


December 2018

The Voice from Down the Hallway

The Voice from Down the Hallway


Sad to see
Still I keep looking
Is it sadder to seek than to find?
Sometimes

Sometimes I think I'd rather keep on running
Endorphins pumping
In my mind, always
Hear a voice from down the hallway

Where are you?
You were there
I could have sworn, I swear
I don't believe in you
Where were you when...?
So many uniforms
So assured, so pressed on
Press me against the glass
Pin me to the cork
There are many forms of falling to make of me
And do I want to meet the voice from down the hallway?

Gazing
Glazed and green
I am turning into a knife
Inside

Inside I'm making such a spectacle
Outstretched in longing
In my mind, always
Hear a voice from down the hallway

And I follow you
As if swallowed into
Besides, the doors are all locked anyway

Where are you?
You were there
I could have sworn, I swear
I don't believe in you
Where were you when...?
So many uniforms
So assured, so pressed on
Press me against the glass
Pin me to the cork
There are many forms of falling to make of me
And do I want to meet the voice from down the hallway?


January 2019

Slow Train

Slow Train


Look up Annie, there’s a black train on my tail
How could I tell you who to love, how not to fail?
But for awhile I'd be good to you
And more than that, Lord I wish I knew
Going down the tracks, even a slow train catches you

Those aren’t stars in your eyes, only coins for the ferryman
(Hear that whistle blowin')
I still blame your parents for inviting the vampire in
(That train whistle blowing)
And all the times I said don’t run from home
But had I known, child, had I known
Hindsight's like a copper in a purse of ring-wove gold

You said, go down to the river if you’re lost deep in the woods
(Hear that whistle blowin')
I couldn’t hear the water so I followed what I understood
(That train whistle blowing)
And for awhile I didn’t feel any pain
Nor cold from walking in the winter rain
When your arms had found me, I felt no warmth, all the same

So look up Annie, there’s a black train on my tail
Wish I had more to give you than a ghost for your white whale
But for awhile, hope I was good to you
And more than that, I wish I didn’t do
Going down the tracks, even a slow train catches you

Hear that whistle blowin'
That train whistle blowing
Hear that whistle blowin'
That train whistle blowing...


Written in late 2017
Revised September 27, 2019

Devil to Blame

Devil to Blame


I am no stranger to your beauty
You've let down your hair often in my company
There are more than star-kissed eyes in your beautiful head
Full of thoughts to marvel upon
Fertile for awe and for dread

Devil to blame
I'll be your devil to blame
To topple the scales
And syphon the pain
You be my angel
And I'll do the same
I'll be your devil to blame
Devil to blame

I come to you when I am so world-weary
Whatever we do, it's not enough and yet so extreme
So much more to Heaven and Earth than in their philosophies
What you do with your time
Deserves no apology

Devil to blame
I'll be your devil to blame
To topple the scales
And syphon the pain
You be my angel
And I'll do the same
I'll be your devil to blame
Devil to blame

I am no stranger to your beauty
No stranger though lost in my familiarity
As I watch them cast to the fire such crude effigies
Knowing they do not know you
Knowing and not knowing

Devil to blame
I'll be your devil to blame
To topple the scales
And syphon the pain
You be my angel
And I'll do the same
I'll be your devil to blame
Devil to blame


January 3, 2019

Another Ghost Without a Grave

Another Ghost Without A Grave


I caught myself
Playing with matches
In the hallway
Of another hotel
South of the Bible belt
These idel hands
When you can't sleep
When you just can't sleep

Had a dream I was a kid's balloon
Keeping me down cause it makes everyone smile
Should I hate the hand or my own string?
And do I really want the clouds?
I mean, do I really want the clouds?
Now it's four hours 'til dawn
Another ghost without a grave

I'm at a loss
With ten missed calls
I should have answered
But I'm feeling small
Maybe they'll leave me alone
It's scary to want it
When you can't sleep
When you just can't sleep

Had a dream I was a kid's balloon
You keep me down cause it makes everyone smile
Should I hate your hand or my own string?
And do I really want the clouds?
I mean, do I really want the clouds?
Now it's three hours 'til dawn
Another ghost without a grave
Another ghost without a grave

I've got a voodoo doll
And a black mirror
I've got candles of saints
And a road full of fog


April 1, 2018

Boy Gone Bust

Boy Gone Bust


Polly Kazan got a new boyfriend
He's got heart full of Warfarin
You know, you know, you know, you know, you know me
You know, you know, you know the way that I see

Johnny B. Good and Rob Roberson
Called it love then let the trust funds win
You know, you know, you know, you know, you know me
You know, you know, you know, you know, you know me

Seppuku Sam got a winning horse
Beat it to death as you do of course
You know, you know, you know, you know, you know me
You know, you know, you know the way that I see
Things play out
Just like they always do
It's not like I want to be right
Might I comfort you?
How would you trust a boy gone bust?
I won't lose you
If you were never mine to have
I won't...
You know, you know, you know, you know, you know me
You know, you know, you know what I will not be

Lenny burned down the revival tent
Then changed the names of the innocent
Had a public affair with his publicist
His finest work of fiction was a grocery list
Polly gave his eulogy in the Everglades
They shot him from a cannon full of retconed alocades
And Sam wanted a punchline without any joke...
I watched the alligators as they watched for a scapegoat
And you know, you know, you know, you know, you know me
And you know, you know, you know, you know, you know me

Cordelia, must you be so gay?
These tempests give to take away
Yeah, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know me
You know, you know, you know the way that I see
Things play out
Just like they always do
It's not like I want to be right
Might I comfort you?
How would you trust a boy gone bust?
I won't lose you
If you were never mine to have
I won't...
You know, you know, you know, you know, you know me
And you know, you know, you know, you know, you know me


April 6, 2018

Powerless

Powerless


Powerless
Oh, it's a wretched feeling
Such wretched wretchedness
Powerless
Such a wretched feeling
So difficult to confess

I am whole
But I'm wholly incontinent as is
I would chew off a limb
To not feel so limbless
When I hear that you're hurting
In despair, in distress
And all I can do for you
Is stand by, powerless

I hope you know
There is a love held on for you
Please know, that there is love meant for you...

Violence
It festers in me
Fetishised recompense
Violence
Oh what I'd do
If I could, if perchance

It takes hold
Like a riptide, I'm pulled astray
Cold blood boils, off I'm shaking
Elucidating shadow plays
I know sheetrock from a cave's wall
I punch it all the same
When I hear that you're hurting
With no dragons to be slayed

I hope you know
There is a love held on for you
Please know, that there is love meant for you

Even though, it is but another - shadow in the valley
In the dark, where you are - so scared but still walk on...
I hope
That you know
That you know
I hope you know...

I am whole
But I'm wholly incontinent as is
I would chew off a limb
To not feel so limbless
When I hear that you're hurting
In despair, in distress
And all I can do for you
Is stand by, powerless
Yeah, I am whole
But I'm wholly incontinent as is
I'd chew off a fucking limb
To not feel so limbless
When I hear that you're hurting
In despair, in distress
And all I can do for you
Is stand by, powerless

Powerless...
Powerless...


March 28, 2018

Hobnail

Hobnail


I'm falling out of your graces
I'm like a skin on a cooling stew
I'm stirring up dust just by leaving the room
Honey, just say I'm spent
You know I can't take a hint
Not when it's so inconvenient

Cause what's a slippery slope to your one and only?
Tell me, what's a crawl in the mud to your dear hobnail?
I'm pushing it all back underneath my skin
What's a crying shame more to your Al Jolson?

I'm picking petals like chambers in a gun
One thing to another, just lead me on
If you be the bottle then I'll be the worm
Honey, just say, "You're it"
I'll spin you round a bit
I've still got one last hit, in me

Cause what's a slippery slope to your one and only?
Tell me, what's a crawl in the mud to your dear hobnail?
I'm pushing it all back underneath my skin
What's a crying shame more to your Al Jolson?


March, 2018

In a Place

In a Place


Did I miss some opening?
Some inside joke while out in the line?
Were you hoping I was keen?
Belladonna you're tonight
I'd rather see you in daylight
Of course I'd rather keep my head on something tight

Am I in a good place?
Come on you should call
Come on you should call my name out when...
Wanted me to answer? I'm answering!
Am I in a good place?
Come on you should call
I'm starting to thaw my widow's veil
I'm in a weird place to let you in
But come in

Cat's in the closet, the bones are all bagged
To confess or brag, the table's set
Hey, first impressions aren't a lifetime past us yet
You're terrible at taking care of yourself
I don't know how to live if not for someone else
Withdraw in disgust, hope doing the right thing is what helps

Pepper's ghost
I feel like a bumkin
Gonna make me lose my head... now
Back in the crowd
I didn't see nothing
Gonna make me lose my head
'Til I forget my parking lot etiquette
I just quit
I can't keep on playing the clown

Am I in a good place?
Come on you should call
Come on you should call my name out when...
Wanted me to answer? I'm answering!
Am I in a good place?
Come on you should call
I'm pawning my feathers off for scales
I'm in a weird place to let you in
But come in

Pagliacci, I'm tonight
Wish you would see me in daylight
Pepper's ghost, can't keep my head on nothing tight

Am I in a good place?
Come on you should call
Gonna make me lose my head... now
Am I in a good place?
Come on you should call
Gonna make me lose my head... now

March, 2018

Ambrosia

Ambrosia


I wish that I could never drink
Another glass of water
Or breathe another breath of air
All the things that you must think
Seeing your trotter wane to totter
Of them I wish that I didn't care

Maybe then I wouldn't need
So many useless things
Just to get from here to there
Where then I come back 'round again
Nothing gained but worse for wear

I wish that I could never drink
Another glass of water
Or breathe another breath of air
Not for having gorged on grief
So as to seek some slow self-slaughter
But to be stronger than a bee toting a bear

Maybe then I wouldn't need
So many useless things
Just to get from here to there
Where then I come back 'round again
Nothing gained but worse for wear

I wish I didn't need to blow
Smoke rings whenever I do smoke
I wish that I didn't need to sing
Whenever silence joins me on the road
I wish I didn't need to paint
Every visage flown from ebbing dreams
To sleep I'd simply close my eyes
Their lids not a movie projector's screen
I wish that I could punch a clock, kiss a good wife and save up to die
Without all of these useless things
That do nothing but make me feel alive

Nothing gained but worse for wear
Nothing gained, you say, but worse for wear
Well, I wish I didn't care!
I wish that I didn't care!
Maybe then I wouldn't need
So many useless things
Just to get from here to there
Where then I come back 'round again
Where then I come back 'round again
Yeah, here I come back 'round again!

I wish I didn't have a thirst
Like a fool that's tasted ambrosia
I wish I were a bee and not a bear


December 8, 2017

Star-stuck

Star-stuck


It's been a long night
Can't you take a hint?
You keep pushing pillars
But you're not Samson
She wants to have a good time
And you're all out of that
Stand in the middle of the street
It's where you're already at

It's not my job to make you stop
Keep throwing knives, one's sure to stick
Whipsawed in wanderlust
Sick of home and still homesick
Keep throwing knives, one's sure to stick

So where to, Captain?
Every dog has a star
That don't make it your day
You'd rather keep chasing cars
Good as I've been to you
You go and show me your teeth
I ought to cut you down, good
You punky dogwood tree

It's not my job to make you stop
Keep throwing knives, one's sure to stick
Whipsawed in wanderlust
Sick of home and still homesick
You're so sick of home and still homesick

It's not my job to make you stop
Keep throwing knives, one's sure to stick
Whipsawed in wanderlust
Sick of home and still homesick
Keep throwing knives, one's sure to stick


March, 2018

Get to You

Get to You


Hey, hey - Mr. Welcoming Big Smile
Is it safe to touch the new coat of paint?
I was told - but hey, what does it matter?
People say just the damdest things, I guess
Well, I guess

Does it get to you
More than you can take?
More than you can take?
Does it get to you
More than you can take?
More than you can take?
Does it get to you
More than you can take?
More than you can take?
Does it get to you?
Does it get to you, yet?

You play with wandering fingers
Despite holding firm your tongue
Braids and bows in delicate rivers
The kind of spider that wants to come undone
Under thumb

Does it get to you
More than you can take?
More than you can take?
Does it get to you
More than you can take?
More than you can take?
Does it get to you
More than you can take?
More than you can take?
Does it get to you?
Does it get to you, yet?

She's got a haunt in your corner
Breathing right against the back of your neck
Go on and make your grand introductions
She still wears what you wanted her to forget
What you left

Does it get to you
More than you can take?
More than you can take?
Does it get to you
More than you can take?
More than you can take?
Does it get to you
More than you can take?
More than you can take?
Does it get to you?
Does it get to you, yet?


February, 2018

The Kids are Right

The Kids are Right


You tell them that they're the problem
But you won't let them fix it
Thoughts and prayers, thoughts and prayers
We cannot be too hasty
There are rights at stake
Pay no attention to the swastikas
They're just too young to be sincere

You say, what about the video games?
All that hip-hop devil music?
Thoughts and prayers, thoughts and prayers
Let's not go do something crazy
There are rights at stake
Those of people old enough to vote
Old enough to make quite handsome contributions
All you can see is how you're the real victim

Hate to tell you but the kids are right
It's not alright, it's not alright what you've done
On their knees screaming, "none of this is normal!"
Hate to tell you but the kids are right
It's not alright, they shouldn't have to be the adults
Just lick their wounds and pray - no, none of this is normal!

They're just too young to be sincere
They must be puppets
How could they ever know what's best
We know what's best, for them
We fight the fires with gasoline
We know what's best, for them
We fight the fires with gasoline
With gasoline
Just add gasoline!

Hate to tell you but the kids are right
It's not alright, it's not alright what you've done
On their knees screaming, "none of this is normal!"
Hate to tell you but the kids are right
It's not alright, they shouldn't have to be the adults
Just lick their wounds and pray - no, none of this is normal!

Pay no mind to the swastikas
Pay no mind to all these toxic notions of love
Pay no mind to her black eye
This is for shooting and this is for fun
And all you can see is how you're the victim

Hate to tell you but the kids are right
It's not alright, it's not alright what you've done
On their knees screaming, "none of this is normal!"
Hate to tell you but the kids are right
It's not alright, they shouldn't have to be the adults
Just lick their wounds and pray - no, none of this is normal!


March, 2018

Lapis Lazuli

Lapis Lazuli


We don't talk anymore
Don't see you out at the shows
Have you grown so sick at heart?
Standing ridged 'mongst waving rows
The winds they haven't changed you
So much as brought things to light
Still I don't know where to go from here
No one's leaving to say goodbye...
But I'll try...

We don't talk anymore
Was it something that I did?
I've been sifted down powder fine
Is that a stone stuck to your ribs?
The winds I feel they are carrying me
Like a dervish, round but not far
Another color trying to be the next lapis lazuli
I was a shadow between you and the wall...
Until you ceased to call...

We don't talk anymore
Maybe that is for the best
We don't talk anymore
Just let rest unsaid all the rest
The winds they haven't changed you
So much as brought things to light
Still I don't know where to go from here
No one's leaving to say goodbye...
But I'll try...
But I'll try...


February, 2018

Lover Awhile

Lover Awhile

Signals get mixed
Could of sworn that we agreed
But I just couldn’t keep out of the clouds
I’m backsliding
Into trust-falls in the woods
When there’s no one to hear any sound

Lover awhile
I can’t ask you now to be
Something that we both know that we can’t be
Lover awhile
Don’t want to need you with these needs
So be free, but do come around, if you please

Look at me now
Gone and come so far, indeed
Believe me when I say, I’m improving
But don’t kiss the hook
Still so far from figured out
Not okay – so much as just managing

Lover awhile
I can’t ask you now to see
These scenes as they play out for my unease
Lover awhile
Don’t want to need you with these needs
So please, don’t think of me how I am claiming

Don’t read that text
It was late and there was cheer
And you know how I always get at parties
You’re little black cloud
Keeps his head up for one more year!
What a year! Taken my glut and still starving

Lover awhile
I can’t ask you now to be
Something that we both know that we can’t be
Lover awhile
Don’t want to need you with these needs
So be free, but do come around, if you please


October 10, 2017

Silver Miner

Silver Miner


Bereft of hope
My life’s flown these ambling beelines
From shabby boy to dapper drone
Through poetry upon sweet winds
Tread drunk in love and heartbroken
These city streets always my home
But I don’t know no more these flowers
Pushing the cracks wide to be free
When I am pointed to the shears
To kill the weeds

By the horde upon on the hill
Ever the horde upon the hill – lookin’ down on all of the sheep
Wish there was something I could say
But only lies pool on my tongue
When I try to kiss the day, like a lover I am not

I can’t be a lining shiner
But I will be your silver miner
In this dark and dirty tunnel
With my canary I will sing!

Bereft of hope
A garden-grown comfort in clinging
Debts amassed – so creditable
‘Til wafts of teargas on the wind
Words thrown through my little terrarium
These city streets always my home
But stranger to their dancing fires
Bloody cults of graven bronze
And the solemn waltz of candles
The tomorrows that the stars… mourn

While the horde is on the hill
Ever this horde upon the hill - lookin’ down on all of the sheep
And the guards have been sent away
But the flowers show their thorns
Wish I could sing ‘em a lullaby, like the lover I am not

I couldn’t be a lining shiner
But I will be a silver miner
In this dark and dirty tunnel
With my canary I will sing!

No I can’t be your lining shiner
But I will be a silver miner
In this dark and dirty tunnel
With my canary I will sing…
To hold on
Hold on
Hand in hand, to pull through
You got to hold on
Hold on
Hand in hand, to pull through
You’ve got to hold on
Hold on, now
Hand in hand, to pull through
Hand in hand, to pull through

August 18, 2017 (Revised September 4, 2017)

The Morning-After Bell

The Morning-After Bell


I wanted today to be so golden, but I lost
So play me the blues – cause I’m blue
I could complain – but what good – would it do?
You wouldn’t change – if you knew

That I wanted to be your friend
When you were filling up with light
How could we need the morning?
For an hour, roses scoured the night
And I wanted to be your friend
And I wanted to be right…

How many times have I said, “this time,” just to not?
Pandering to – the ripcord
No good at this – I was raised right – give me that
Can’t keep up with you – for very long

But I wanted to be your friend
When you were filling up with light
How could we need the morning?
“Precious” we bestow on the finite
And I wanted to be your friend
And I wanted to be right…

But I can’t stand the way you treat the broken in your life
I can’t stand the way you kiss and tell

Maybe tomorrow I’ll do better – I’ll be on
Stir my coffee even when it’s black
I wish I were fooled – instead I just – play the fool
Limping away – from your ruin

Still I wanted to be your friend
When you were filling up with light
How could we need the morning?
All my quiet fears you did benight
And I wanted to be your friend
And I wanted to be right…

But I can’t stand the way you treat the broken in your life
I can’t stand the way you kiss and tell
No, I can’t stand the way you play so nice but are not kind
I can’t stand the morning-after bell


July 26th, 2017

Within

Within


Tip my hat
I am so disappointed
You had me for a moment
Yeah, well played
I call all of the numbers
No one answers but machines
I gave you my endorsement
It was a grave mistake

I invited you inside
Where I showed you all their necks
In the mirror all I saw was my own face
Flirting with the sisters of the ones that got away
Tell me, how long have you always been this way?
Flirting with the sisters of the ones that got away
In the mirror I can only see my face

Take a bow
I am so ashamed
I had them for a moment
Then the moment got away
I call all of the numbers
No one answers but machines
I feel older than I am
And lonelier than vanity

Lurching, leering, bargaining
Kissing hipbones, pawing knees
Let’s arrange my skeletons – autobiographically

I invited you inside
Where I showed you all their necks
In the mirror all I saw was my own face
Flirting with the daughters of the ones that got away
Tell me, how long have you always been this way?
Flirting with the daughters of the ones that got away
In the mirror I can only see my face


July 23, 2017