Ruin Bound: Cigarette Breath Mint

Cigarette Breath Mint


Heard that Billy got creamy with a drugstore genie
And wished for a six-foot shlong
She struck him out on that one
She struck him out on that one
She struck him out and was gone

Now whenever he gets hard
His brain gets blood-starved
Yeah, he blacks out like a chump
When he tries to get it up
She struck him out on that one
She struck him out on that one
She struck him out and was gone…

‘Nother one of them…
Cow tipping… white lightning sipping…
Country boy stupid ideas
Country boy stupid ideas

Napalm grapes for the fugitive apes
Leave smoking craters in the driveway
The remains of a dull day
The remains of a dull day
Remain with nothing to say

When the parents came home
And the zoo had all unwound
An explanation was expected
For the absence of the ground
But remains of a dull day
The remains of a dull day
Remain with nothing to say…

‘Nother one of them…
Cow tipping… white lightning sipping…
Country boy stupid ideas
Country boy stupid ideas

Chopper hog alarm clock
Waking up the whole block at three in the damndest morning…
And they heed to no warning
No, they heed to no warning
Every night hear their motors roaring

And their mothers, they do prey
That the lord will show the way
And protect them from above
From the dangers that they love
Still they heed to no warning
No, they heed to no warning
At three in the damndest morning…

Banana skin salesmen and ambulance chasers
That’s what they’ll become, these suburban debasers
While their neighbors grow up to be veteran jocks
Broken Ahabs pining for the major league
And their sisters, they’ll all say
That it’s the American way
As they bend over and say, “I do”
And then we’ll all one day be old, working in a big chain store
Saying “welcome” to the young whores passing through…

Grounded to your room with a carbon black spoon
And a choo-choo chewed up arm
But there’s no need for alarm
No, there’s no need for alarm
It’s not like you feel the harm

After the crank lab explosion
Survivors claimed to be chosen
Foe a fresh start to repent
Just a cigarette breath mint
But there’s no need for alarm
There’s no need for alarm
It’s not like you feel the harm…

It’s not like you feel the harm…

‘Nother one of them…
Cow tipping… white lightning sipping…
Country boy stupid ideas
Country boy stupid ideas